The Art of the Fistpump.

I was hangin with some of my brothers last night over at Nevada Smith's just shootin the random shit as always. No matter where you go, it seems as if you cannot avoid the inevitable topic of discussion- Jersey Shore. That show has taken on a life of its own...really the first show that actually makes a race other than African-American look subhuman. Instead of hearin them brag about being niggaz, you hear them brag about being guidos and guidettes. It may seem staged...but I know that it really ain't.

I digress though.

One of the main things brought to the forefront is when they go out clubbin & you hear that house music pumpin. Oh yeah. See, house music at least to me is nearly impossible to dance to...or at least truly dance to. Personally I could do ballet pirouettes with some hops & it will look like I "own the dance floor". I wonder if the Irish Jig/Riverdance & shit like that are distant relatives of this house music flavor. In efforts however to curtail this embarrassment for many, the fistpump was developed. Similar to when you do the 1-2 step when hip hop is played, you must first feel the beat. Typically the beat has to go BOOM BOOM BOOM DUSH or some variant. I do not know any house artists persay outside of Boris but you'll hear it. Then, what I personally do when I'm gettin ready to mock the pump is crank the arm, get my shoulder ready, cock the arm to 90 degrees and like a tomahawk, pump that mothafuckin fist in the air!!! That shit is fire. Sometimes when the beat is intense you gotta get both in the air but you're not wavin them around like you just don't care so be careful. I don't think people appreciate it however when I fistpump bc they think I am mocking their culture. Yes, and no. By the way, the fistpump is most effective when done randomly. Don't fistpump to Day and Night by Kid Cudi either.

What was once confined to the mean streets of LI and the Jersey Shore can now make its way to places such as Minneapolis, Des Moines, Denver and perhaps even Boise. Thanks to MTV, Jersey Shore has opened up horizons and doors which otherwise would never have been opened for these folks. You're motivated to get into the gym, pump it up (the iron), take fresh fruit & blend it with Bacardi for pregaming and so forth. The fistpump however, is the one thing you MUST take from it. You'll fit right in, it's a simple yet very powerful move. And for the fellas, combine that with a girl grinding her upper body all up on you when she got her hands up...fuhgetabowtit. You just need to handle the situation & take care of the rest from there.

And so on.